Unexpected Places

I know I have talked about this before but it happened to me again.  Finding my daughters name in unexpected places.  Here is the story...

Miranda, my friend, had a party last night and so we were all gathered around having a good time. We had spent the afternoon getting ready for it and it was finally here and kicking in full swing when we finally got to sit down for a minuet.  During that time we were enjoying the party and the lady was giving her usual talk about the company and stuff. Well I had won a door prize and after picking out which one I wanted I held it in my lap as she continued on.  I don't know why but I just can't keep my attention on anything these days. My mind likes to wander and it started doing just that. As I sat there my mind somewhere else and fidgeting with my new toy I flipped it over to read the instructions.  As I was reading something in the top right hand corner caught my eye. I wasn't even look in that spot but I saw something.  Did that say what I thought it did?  I had to look again just to easy my curiosity.  Indeed it did say what I expected.  Up on top of the little piece of paper was my daughters name.  In full view.  It took my breath away for a moment.  Then I had to study it some more.  Was it spelled like hers?  Was it really there.  It sure was the address to the company was in Addison, Illinois.  I had no idea there was such a place.  No idea that I would find my daughters name in such an unusual spot. 

It was hard for a moment to see that. It was like she was there but she really wasn't. I don't know it is hard to describe but I had to show my findings to someone so I leaned over and showed Miranda.  I thought I was making things up but with her affirmation it really did say her name.  Wow, at that moment it was like she was right there in the room with me. She was on my lap listening to something I wasn't.  It was so weird. It is just hard to describe.  As the party wore on I couldn't quit thinking about the name, Her Name.  It was just another reminder to me that she was here. I know that is silly to see and address and feel and think all that but to me that name is so special. It means so much to me and it always will.  It is her name.  I can't help but get emotional when I think about her name.  It is her identity after all. The way her name came about the way it was and is perfect for her.  That is always a big part of having a baby deciding on the name and this one just fit for so many reasons. 

I know I will probably see her name a lot over the years, in unexpected places. But for some reason this time it was different. I didn't break down at the sight of it. Although it did take me a moment to regain my composure it didn't instantly spur on tears.  Maybe that is a sign it is getting easier. I don't know, but to see her name in weird spots it is just a affirmation that my baby is still in my heart and will always be.  She is special and so every time I see that name it is going to be special because it will remind me of my daughter and maybe some day seeing it will make me smile a little more.